Monday, 7 January 2008

the bear

for a long time, i wasn't into videogames (or computergames) at all. now, with my boyfriend a. working in the computergames industry, things started to change, but even though i play guild wars online with him, and sometimes civilization or pirates, i still haven't made my way into videogames - i'm still watching a. play. it's almost like watching a movie, the difference being that the main character actually hears what you are saying and responds on it - or not.

the last game a. played and i watched was a pretty weird one, it is called "psychonauts" and takes place in a kids-summer-camp, where they learn how to fight their way into and through other people's brains. of course the main character (called raz) finds out about some kind of conspiracy when he realizes that one of his camp-mates doesn't have a brain and he encounters some nightmare about that when visiting his own mind. we didn't get any further than that until now, but it's a lot of fun and i guess the people who made the game had a lot of fun when they made it.

in the game, there is also one russian kid, mikhail, standing close to the woods. the dialogue with him is the one that stuck with me until now: "Have you seen bear lurking in woods, with skin where hair should be? In Russia bears are smaller, and more fur, less lurking... always eager to wrestle." a bit later, he adds: "Cannot lurk forever, bear." i read in some other blog about this little scene, a journalist-student stating that writing was her own private bear that she had and was eager to wrestle, and got to think that this bear is a good picture for different challenges in life. my own private bear right now is rather like the russian bears the kid is missing. it's not lurking at all but coming with bigger and bigger steps towards me, and i have to admit, i start to get frightened. in exactly two weeks i'll have the first of three final oral exams, and even though this is the smallest one and even though i usually don't have a problem with oral exams, i feel out of practice and would prefer to be able to push it back. it's just that i can't. i have to get through with the wrestling, and all i can do is prepare myself.

back to studying. hard.

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